What Excites Us!

Episode 38: Exploring Light and Dark Eros with Lucia Gabriela

Transcript:

[00:00:00] Gwyn: Hello and welcome to What Excites Us!, the podcast that discusses sex and sexuality, so that you'll know deeply and truly that you, your interests and your sexual expressions are okay. My name is Gwyn Isaacs. I am a certified sex coach who has been happily helping folks feel good in their sexuality since 2017, officially long before that, unofficially.

This episode is a conversation with Lucia Gabriela, the creator of TantriKink, founder of the Sacred Love Temple and the Sarasota Dark Temple, who is bringing a few of her workshops to Long Island in July this year, 2023. Lucia helps individuals and couples to master their life, relationships, and intimacy with themselves and others. As a trauma informed relationship and intimacy coach, Lucia Gabriela creates sacred and safe space for individuals and couples to heal, transform, and up level their relationships. As a result, clients learn how to develop conscious and meaningful intimacy.

As a somatic therapist and Tantra facilitator, Lucia specializes and works with individuals whose journey is to liberate themselves from emotional and sexual traumas. She helps them reclaim their creative power, body, voice, sensuality, and sexuality to welcome pleasure into their lives, creations and relationships. She offers her coaching and somatic services at Nuna Holistic Retreat Center. As a trauma informed therapeutic kink practitioner and TantriKink creator, Lucia fuses the power of Tantra and kink BDSM to help clients connect with their body wisdom, discover their erotic archetypes, and master their erotic energy.

Lucia is also an event producer. She created Soul y Luna Tantric Shamonic Retreat Festival, and Intimacy and Desire 2.0 Conference. She's the co-producer of Turn On Miami and Explorer Tantra Festival. Before we dive in, I want you to know that there is more of our conversation that you can listen to at the Patreon for the show. We talk about some of the myths around kink and tantra and all sorts of other stuff. The easiest way to find that is by going to whatexcitesus.com. Thank you Lucia, for coming on and doing this podcast with me. I'm super excited to connect with you, in general, but also about the stuff that you have going on.

[00:02:56] Lucia: Thank you so much Gwyn I would really appreciate you for inviting me to your podcast. I am loving it.

[00:03:02] Gwyn: Yay. So the listeners will have already heard your bio, but why don't you just give us a little bit about who you are and how you got here?

[00:03:11] Lucia: Wow. That's a lot

[00:03:14] Gwyn: Yeah. In two seconds or less, no I'm just kidding.

[00:03:18] Lucia: I love this question so much and sometimes I really don't know what to say or where to start because. It depend of like what my audience is and, you know, we don't want to get the audience bored as well. It's like, oh my god, this lady's life, right? So, so what can I start with is I'm really passionate and excited I'm reeling my heart about creating spaces, creating containers, creating events, creating opportunities, creating sessions. I'm a creatrix first of all. I love to create the possibilities where we can come together and experience, embrace, and I would say create conscious relationships and intimacy.

What does that mean consciousness? To me, one of my favorite mentors, Tony Robbins talks about consciousness is the aspect of caring. And I kind of resonate a lot with that, that sense of caring, because it's not just about mindfulness, you can be thoughtful and mindful, but do you really care? Right? Like, do you really have that in your heart? Like I can be very mindful about what are the things I'm saying, but could I be really caring about what I'm saying? Right? So sometimes it doesn't go together. And to me about creating these caring, loving relationship that are meaningful. We're here to create, we're here to build, we're here to manifest, we're here to, not just evolve, but expanding.

So as you can tell, like, I'm really passionate about creating that sense of awakening awareness, reclaiming opening up the space, that the feel, the conversation, the possibilities to how is that we can live very meaningful, delicious life and intimacy with ourselves and with our partners. And after saying that, what do I do, who I am? At some point, it doesn't even matter, to be honest with you.

It's like I have so many titles. I am a relationship and intimacy coach that I help clients towards struggling in the intimacy. I'm a somatic therapist, helping clients who are stuck in their bodies and they're not connecting with the bodies. They feel numb. I'm creatix I'm a producer. I produce the Tantric Somatic Festival here in the state of Florida. I have different productions where I bring the fusion of different sacred sexuality practices and including Kink BDSM. I'm a founder of the Sacred Love Temple. And I have been a pioneer here in the state of Florida that I'm bringing conscious intimacy relationship workshop experiences, seminars, and conferences.

And at the same time, I am the founder of the Sarasota Dark Temple, which is, a conscious kink BDSM community where we actually we're bringing the education, we're bringing like the sense of caring and like building a community that is mindful, caring, and also reliable. So, at the core. All of this is I really desire to know you, desire to know the audience, desire to know like what it is that you guys want, and need at your core. And maybe some few word of wisdom that I have gained in my life I will be able to share. And that's it. I'm here to provide facilitate and, answer any questions or curiosity or, yes, I'm here for you. What do you want? What do you need? What do you desire?

[00:06:59] Gwyn: That's beautiful and amazing, and what a wonderful answer to a very complex question said in a simple term. But yeah, I, I recognize that it's not an easy thing to answer, especially when someone is so involved in so many different things like you are. All right, so let's put some focus on it since we're both kind of out there, people. You're planning on doing an event in New York in July, I believe.

[00:07:29] Lucia: Mm-hmm. So I'm coming back to New York in July, and I can tell you that it's gonna be like a very interesting experience for me because when I move out of my country, because I'm from Ecuador, I moved to New York and Long Island especially. So in Long Island, I'm coming in July and I'm gonna be on the full moon on Monday, July 3rd. I believe so, because July 4th is a Tuesday.

We're gonna start on a Monday with the women workshop experience for all biological females. It's gonna be a woman Tantric journey, so it's gonna be about healing sexuality, womb healing, and breast massage. And one of the interesting things is that I have worked with hundred thousand of women, but hundred of practitioners in the realm of Tantra and sometimes there's a disconnection between the womb and their breast, right? Like they even talk about, it's like, well, I teach this to women, but I myself, I'm like disconnected. Like, I haven't done my own breast massage. So I find like it's really powerful to bring that sensuality and the healing of the womb and the healing of the breast because it's all about that creativity that we are as biological female woman, you know, is, is important to, recognize, adore, appreciate and embrace our body.

No matter what your psychology and your mindset about yourself, I am this, I am that. Whatever you wanna label yourself, that's fine. That is in your mind, that is in your psychology you can label yourself as however you want to. I, at one point I used to call myself I was an alien because I didn't feel that connection with my human body and my humanity. And it took me a journey of healing to recognize myself. I'm like human fucking woman, end of the story. And, and to relate to my genitals and to relate to my body, to my womb, and to my sexuality and to my breast because part of my sexuality, right?

And one of the awareness that I want to bring into that full moon ritual, because it will be a ritualistic, ceremonial event, is that bring it back to the body. Because if we reject our body, our body will reject us. You know, your mindset can be very clear and be like, you know my mindset, but if you reject your body, your body will reject you.

You know I come from a background who ever knows me and heard my story. I heal cancer at the age of 15, 16 years old, naturally holistically, homeopathically. And I know this by firsthand. The reason why I developed that is because I was hating my body. I hated myself. I hated my life. I was suicidal for 10 years. I started my journey of being suicidal since I was five years old, because as an alien identify myself. I did not believe that why I was in the staying planet too toxic. Too much argument. Too much fight, too much abuse. Why I am here. I don't wanna belong here. I used to look at the stars every single night and I would look at the stars and say like, where are you gonna come and pick me up? I don't belong to this planet. Right? And I was rejecting my humanity, rejecting my human body. And I was doing everything possible I used to cut my hand, you to cut my fingers, you to hurt myself. I, I'm telling you, I'm telling you this, because I realized that I was rejecting myself so much. Nobody else was rejecting me. I was rejecting myself. And I developed cancer. That cancer was my awakening. It was my portal to Tantra to be honest with you.

Because through the knowledge of the Gnostic and the knowledge and Tantra I was able to get back to my self-love, to loving myself, loving my body, loving my heart. So I'm a queen of boundaries. And because when I talk about boundaries it's about the wellbeing of my body. If I don't feel that I'm an integrity with the wellbeing of my body, I know that a boundary need to be in place to protect and to preserve the integrity of my body. Period.

So that is on Monday, the first one. Then the second workshop that we have coming up, it will be the workshop for the Tantra love. It's gonna be an initiation for people to explore Tantra in a safe way. That is about energy. It's about connection, it's about compassion. It's about really tapping into this infinity heart and into the heart of like weaving ourself into all the realm that we exist, like bringing into the journey that's gonna be dance and movement. And that's gonna be on Wednesday.

And then on Thursday we are looking at relationship for couples. It's gonna be a couples experience, we'll call the art of ecstatic intimacy and giving couples the opportunity to connect at a deeper level. Because I have worked with hundred couples now, and I can tell you something. At the core of the meaning and the need of sexuality and sex in the relationship. At the core of every single couple that I work with, every single man, every single woman, every single partner I have worked with at the core, they desire to have meaningful connections, meaningful connection, meaningful intimacy, heartfelt or soul felt. They want to be seen, heard, understood at the core. They want to be accepted.

There's so much more than sexuality. Now sex it can be copulation, it can feel good for five minute. Great. If you last for an hour, awesome, great, great for you, woohoo! So then what? I always ask myself the question then what? What after it, what before it?, well, how will the preparation, what will bring the element of kink BDSM preparation, scene and aftercare? How do you prepare your partner to have an intimate moment, a sexual moment? How do you enjoy yourself? Can you, how can you be fully present in the moment? And then how can you create aftercare?

So aftercare, usually the 72 hours experience. So even if you have sex with somebody and you're going to this sexual, tantric sexual journey, you have a responsibility of 72 hours to check in with your partner and make sure that you create a transition where you still have the love of connection. Right? Especially when it comes to like sexuality, especially sex copulation. Have you ever noticed when that it usually we go into like, you know, we have this amazing orgasmic experience and all of a sudden for three days, I don't know if you have noticed, but I know that I count the days we are like so hooked into the person, like waiting for them to call us, text us more details. We, you know, we want 'em to take a out for dinner. We want 'em to make the, we, we as women, I can speak for myself. I desire to feel that I was not just a piece of meat that you got to fuck. I desire to know that you really care, that I'm your number one and priority in your life and that you care for me and I am, you are with me. 72 hours.

If you can create experiences where you partner, can actually feel that is precious to you. You got it. Unfortunately, couples struggle with that. That's what we bring in this experience to help them to realize that, hey, yes, you wanna have a happy, sexy moment, a quickie, a five minute quickie. Great. We have these journeys and why is it important at a psychological, emotional, physiological, and energetic level? Why all these elements are important.

And then the final workshop that we have will be on a Friday, kinky Friday. Yay. And we are gonna be bringing the element of kink BDSM. Gonna be like the initiation, it's gonna be a dark eros initiation. I do have some of my students that live in Long Island and they're gonna continue doing this work, and that's one of my intentions to go in Long Island, is to bring the awareness that we are building in some communities and this, this type of work exist.

[00:15:27] Gwyn: So is this all one festival type event or are you selling separately? Each event is its own standalone thing.

[00:15:38] Lucia: Yeah. They're gonna be individual events. They, we already have created the event. I'm just being confirmed with the venues right now.

[00:15:45] Gwyn: you know, frequently when I tell people what I do for a living, they ask for a hot sex tip. So what I say, not really knowing them or any of their situations is that most sexual issues can be helped with more and better conversation, or lube or both. Now, conversation is really on you, although I can help you if you'd like me to. I do that as a coach. But when it comes to lube, there are two brands that I always reach for first. Uberlube is my go-to silicone lube. It's pure. It's not full of any unnecessary additives that make it smell, taste, or feel, unlike you me. It comes in a beautiful glass bottle that I'm happy to have on my nightstand, and it's great in most situations. However, if you prefer a water-based lube or have some other intimate needs, I recommend Good, Clean Love. They have a variety of great products to help everything in the bedroom goes smoothly, huh. They've got some vaginal care kits, some cleaning solutions, oils and candles. It's really great. Now you can find an affiliate link for these at the podcast's website whatexcitesus.com. And to be clear, you do help me out when you buy through these links, but I specifically reached out to these companies because I truly love their products and I believe in what they're doing. So help yourself. Help me help these lovely companies and get better sex with better lube. Go visit the links for UberLube and Good, Clean Love at whatexcitesus.com.

yeah, that, that'll be really great. So somebody could conceivably do all of them with you or pick and choose and you, you said really carefully, it's not a sex event. So if someone were to not the women's ritual, let's set that aside for a moment cuz I can sort of imagine that. But if someone were to come to one of the couple events, what would they expect?

[00:17:58] Lucia: So when somebody come to the couples event, in the description of the event, I actually share like, what are the things that we're gonna learn? So one of the things that we, we respect is the aspect of connection with the partners. Different Tantric practices to connect with the partners. Also different practices to help them to connect with their own bodies, different practices that help them to connect to surrender, to let God, to be a great receiver and a great giver to also to start learning more about, about themselves. All the experiences are three hours.

So in Tantra talk a lot about taking things slow, like slow it down and being fully present and becoming master of presence and slow, slow slowing it down and being fully focused and present. And there. And not rushing anything. Isn't it about easily three hours goes very fast when we work with couples, especially when we teach them how to do conscious touch, which is the thing that I will be teaching. But before, this is the thing what have to expect, right? You know, everybody can go to an event or experience with touch is gonna be involved. That's what everybody looking for is many times. That's one of the biggest law of language in our relationship. They want to have that sense of connection.

Now, before you touch someone, there's different protocols that need to be in place. It's not about just, oh my God, let's just have an intention and let's just wrap a hand and let's touch a partner. Uhuh there's so many protocols that need to happen, and the thing that people need to realize is that we need to feel connected. Because let's say if yeah, we agreeing together as a couple that we're gonna go to this event, the art of ecstatic intimacy. And, you know, we are looking forward to it. But let's say that two weeks ago, a month ago, you got angry, upset at your partner and you have resentment, right? To have all these emotions that are in the back burner. They are in the closet. But because we don't wanna fucking ruin the experience, we're just gonna play nice and we're gonna be fake and we're just gonna allow a partner to touch us. That can be so hurtful to the relationship because we are not allowing to really connect on a deeper level and heal whatever has happened or whatever's going on.

Because couples that actually come to this event, there's stuff that they coming to heal. They want to connect at a different level because something is not working out, something is missing. The fire has extinguished. There's a reason why they come to this event. And a lot of the time the reason is because we have a lot of emotions that we're putting in the pressure cooker, and they're there waiting to fucking blow up. And it will blow up whenever you least expect it. Whenever you get a trigger out of the blue, it have been just easy trigger that your partner gave you red roses instead of white roses. Right? And you just fucking blew up on it even though that he, just gave you roses. It doesn't matter. They were red, not white, whatever was it. Right? So you will find excuses to jeopardy the relationship and to harm the relationship and to also you will find excuses to sabotage that relationship. That's pretty much the word I'm looking at.

So if we don't have protocols in place before we touch a partner, like consent is one of the aspect of it. So the different aspect of consent that I would like to bring my couples into the journey of consent. May I touch your feet? May I touch your ankles? May I touch your knee? May I touch you thigh? May I touch? Yes, yes, yes. No, no, no. how that feels is that it, it's like the different aspect of the body mapping dynamics where it's not just about like texture and touches and things like that, but it's like aspect of consent. May I come closer to you? May I be far away from you? Like there's different energetic that need to be played. Why?

To me, consent is the medicine for resentment. And I can tell you that nine out of 10 couples that I work with, the reason why they have struggles is resentment. They have anger, resentment, and rage because of things that happen in the past. And usually women, biologically, psychologically, for some reason, we hold on to shit, man. By nature, they let it go. They sometimes they don't even remember. I just work with my couple it's like, oh my gosh. You have a very good timeline. Yeah. As women, we bitches we keep track of the timeline. We know when it happened, what time, what hour, what date, when I work with my female client Usually when I ask them the details, They will gimme the date, they will gimme the time, they will gimme the location. They will gimme everything. When I'm working with my man, oh my God, it's so hard to try to pull them out, you know, pull out the date, the time. Where was it? Do you remember? Where were you sitting? Where were like, they just don't remember. Do you remember what you were wearing?

Women were like, yeah, I was wearing this, I was wearing that. I would dress in this, I take a bath. She's like, it's so fascinating, and it's beyond biology and psychology. Like, I'm trying to just, I don't, I don't understand it, but hey, it's there. And so it is really important that when it come to the different protocol before we touch someone, it's really important to address that. So what to expect? Expect that you're gonna connect with your partner at a deeper level in a way that you have may maybe never heard had it before. Learn about your partner in a way that you haven't really know your partner, and to give permission to yourself to heal whatever need to be healed, to address whatever need to be addressed before you engage in touch where you can. Your partner can feel that, especially if there had been some anger, resentment, frustration, or any kind of like low vibration emotions that before you touch your partner doesn't matter to female male.

Before you touch them, they feel like You got me. You understand you care. And I love when couples come together to this event because I tell you that those couples that they come to this event of relationship events, They make it happen. They are ready and committed to keep going and to the fighting. Like some of them are fighting for the relationship. Some, they're just excited about learning something new, but they are committed to the relationship. You know, I feel like in my heart for couples that one partner wants to go and the other one doesn't want to go. That break my heart many times, and sometimes I have couple that one partner is still into it and the other ones felt forced to do it. And then because they feel forced to do it, quote unquote force between, you know, quotation might force. Nobody forced you anything. You say, no, yes or no, but they feel so forced they feel like obligated to do it. They feel like they need to prove something to the, to the partners. And the partners are all the way in and the partners are like so distant that you can tell. And, you know, make it a little difficult until I bring them in and I break them down in tears usually. and yeah. And then we go for it. I'm just being honest. I'm gonna crack you open somehow.

[00:24:54] Gwyn: Like an egg.

[00:24:56] Lucia: I'm gonna crack you open like an

[00:24:58] Gwyn: Oh my goodness.

[00:24:59] Lucia: not, I have no idea who you came to, but anyway, with consent of court consent. Of course,

[00:25:08] Gwyn: Of course.

[00:25:09] Lucia: of course.

[00:25:11] Gwyn: So it.

[00:25:11] Lucia: My waiver.

[00:25:14] Gwyn: It sounds like there's instruction and then there's experiential stuff that happens. And then I presume that they go home with some new skills that they will hopefully continue practicing and working on. Yeah. And so that's the, Tantric aspect is, is that similar to how you work the, kink and are they separate or you, you have a whole system called TantriKink so,

[00:25:42] Lucia: Yes. So TantriKink is a fusion of Tantra and Kink BDSM. I'm not bringing that event there maybe, maybe if I do a Saturday, maybe we do a Saturday event, we will, because TantriKink is a whole immersion day. It can be a one day immersion or two day immersion. And if I do it as a three hour, four hours event, it can be just a very quick experience to it. And for that, you know, I have done it here in Florida a couple times. I can work. Great. People love it. People love it. Love it, love it, love it.

[00:26:17] Gwyn: But it's more of a, a multi-day thing, and that's not what you're bringing. So so you're doing the Tantra stuff. Are you doing the kink on a separate day and is that sort of the same thing?

[00:26:28] Lucia: Yeah. Yeah. Monday for women. Wednesday for everyone. Thursday for the couples. And then Friday we doing a Kink BDSM for everyone. That's what the Dark Eros initiation is. The Kink BDSM and that's kinda like a small taste, like a taste of TantriKink, but more focused on the kink dynamic of it, of learning the protocols in the system. TantriKink is the future of Tantra Kink BDSM and we focus on the energetic dynamic of the polarity of dominant and submissive. And we do a clearing about, why do I perceive masculine and feminine dominant submissive is about, because we have this preconception, we have this mapping pre-mapping and when we hear the word Tantra and when we hear the word kink, what comes up, right? The aspect of gender comes into play. The aspect of sex comes into play. The aspect of, the politic dominant submissive and domineering could come into place of dominant of the slaves, right? Like some people who have triggered to specific words.

So what we do in TantriKink, the fusion of Tantra Kink BDSM, is that we create a canvas, a clear canvas. That way we do a clearing statement and clearing at the same time where will give ouselves permission to feel the energies as they are without us putting a meaning to, right? So how do I feel my dominant. It could be different. How you feel, you, you're dominant. How I feel my submissive or surrendering is even within the S dynamic, which is surrendering, submissive, adoration, and devotion. That's what the S stand for, not just submissive is submissive, surrendering, devotion and adoration. So how I adore it could be totally different how you adore. How I become submissive it could be totally different how you, you are submissive your qualities, but the energy, the energy is like we call in energy. That's where the metaphysical, shamanic, mystical essence comes into place when we do the invocation of the energy. And I'm go a little shamanic here, but that's the point is like we do an invocation of the energy and allow ourselves to be the vessels of the energies. So if I'm invoking the energy of the dominant, I can feel in my body that I am in the dominant force energy.

A lot more clear, it's more specific. It's there, it's like I can feel it. And the reason why we don't work with the masculine feminine and we clear it out of our field is because I have worked with these energies for like, a long time and even led events and workshop and retreat and everything and one-on-one sessions. And it's really fascinating that when I do the clearing statement and have done it with people, once we invoke the energy of the masculine, and we invoke the energy of the feminine. It is so surprising, interestingly, that people That it kinda like, it goes against the book pretty much whatever my perception of a masculine suposed to be, all of a sudden when I'm calling the energy of masculine energy, the energy that I feel is more the feminine quote unquote. So that's why it, like, it goes against the book when I call in the energy of the feminine, all of a sudden the quality of the masculine will come into place and all of a sudden everybody's looking at each other and it's like, okay. It is really against the book. Like, it, it's not, I'm not experiencing what the books say about this with the dominant and the submissive or surrendering adoration, it's clear. There's no confusion. So that's why I like it to work that way with TantriKink so there's nothing about masculine and feminine and TantriKink at all. We don't work with that energy. We don't work with those philosophy. We don't work with that at all.

[00:30:17] Gwyn: Makes sense do you have things on the books for your next Tantra kink thing that you're doing down in Florida

[00:30:25] Lucia: Yeah, I have one event in June for immersion for couples level one and level two, and I'm gonna be bringing in some other, you know, it usually happens twice or three times a year that we do that event for couples. Right now I'm in the middle of this month, my objective is to finish the first draft of my book, TantriKink a Guide for Couples. So once I'm finishing that, I would like to have that published by the summer. So when we go to the different event, like Fet Cons the other like kink event or even my own retreat or my own trainings, I have the book launched by them. That is my goal. And then once I have the book, it'll be a lot easier for people to understand more of of it and come to the events.

[00:31:15] Gwyn: Yeah, that makes a lot of sense. I look forward to that. That'll be exciting.

[00:31:19] Lucia: Me too.

[00:31:20] Gwyn: Yeah, no kidding. I can imagine you're feeling a

[00:31:23] Lucia: Not kidding.

[00:31:26] Gwyn: so just real quick to circle back to the Friday event here, that is mostly kink oriented. Is it gonna be the same type of some instruction, some experiential, some stuff people can take home? Yeah. And it's couple oriented or is it alone?

[00:31:44] Lucia: Singles and couples.

[00:31:45] Gwyn: Gotcha. That's very exciting.

[00:31:48] Lucia: Yeah. For the women, it's only woman, female woman. For the Tantra lab is everyone's singles and couples. For the couples, only couples or pair people, like, you know, if they're not in a relationship, but they want to come and, and they want to pair. But we need pair people. And then Kink BDSM is everyone. Singles and couples as well. [00:32:10] Gwyn: Neat. so you have a really interesting take on all of it, which you know, I've been in the kink world for a long time. I'm enjoying hearing about the way that you view things. But is the class that you're teaching, is it really oriented towards 101 folks? Or is, are you

[00:32:29] Lucia: It is called the Dark Eros Initiation. So it is level one, I will say, into the realm of Kink BDSM because it will give them the foundations. The basic foundations of Kink BDSM. And anyone can take it because this is a, this is the thing, my background with Kink BDSM is energetic and psychological. I'm a therapeutic kink practitioner. So I come from a background of like, how can we apply this Kink BDSM journey for healing experience, for a transformational journey? What is the meaning of it? What is the intention to it? So there's a lot of intentionality. I have people that have been in the lifestyle for like 20, 30 years. They have been swingers in the communities.

They come to TantriKink especially, and one of the greatest, I will say testimonials of feedback that I get from people who had been in the field for a while. Is that I'm bringing at such a different level of intentionality to the space and to the practice where it's not just about the physical logistical protocols that we put into place, but it's like, before I touch my partner, what do I need to know? Her need, her desires, her fears, her boundaries, what is happening within herself? Understanding the physiological element in place like when I'm like using the paddle. Also even when we utilize in the different tools, some people teach about impact play, and I like to bring more about the, even like the aerodynamics of impact play, like about the, the sound, the psychology of sound, the psychology of texture, the psychology of even color. What are the elements because. It's so important that I can have a paddle and the paddle can be small, the paddle can be big and long. And the sound, the sound can send me activate something in me. The different sound can be different. So I'm bringing the aspect of understanding on a deeper level the psychology of the person that is receiving and also the psychology and the energetic dynamic of the person who is giving. Right?

And energy to me is all about energy and intention. And actually how can we see this person as an energetic being? So if I see them as an energetic being am I utilizing different sensorial props, right? Instrumental tools. If I know where she at in her journey, in her life. And I can utilize tools that enhance her journey, her life in a more blissful relaxation, whatever the intention is, healing experience versus just going and be like, okay, here are the, all the tools. Pick whatever you want. And then we negotiate. And after negotiation, you know, I go for it, and that's it. Right? I can just smack the heck out of the butt and that's it. But how can I bring the sense of like, okay, I can smack the heck out of it because you enjoying it brings a lot of pleasure and erotic essence to you. But how can I also make it in a way where you feel connected?

Where are my hand located? You know, I'm like spanking you, but when I am switching tools, am I putting my hand back on you? Or I'm putting another tool to make you know that I'm there for you. Right? Because the essence of separation. Sometimes even as a professional dominatrix I have interviewed a couple clients that they go to other dominatrix when they work with me and they're like, well, you know what I, I really hate when they put me in the cage and they just walk away from me. And, and they haven't even negotiated that. Like they just put them in the cage and they just leave them there until the Domme does whatever on her phone and whatever, and then come back. And it was not part of the negotiation, or it was not part of, like, even if it was in a negotiation, the essence of absent, fully absent, it can be very retraumatized to the individual. So as you can tell, you know, there's so many elements that when we talk about the foundations of Kink BDSM in a conscious way, it doesn't matter if you have been doing this for 20, 30 years, I'm bringing a different level of awareness,

[00:36:44] Gwyn: Yeah, you really are. Talking about the energetics of it. It's so rare. It's so delightful to hear because it's so rare and it's so important. It's how good foundations are really built are to be aware of what I consider a very base. And I don't mean that in like basic, but like, you know, we are all energy. We, we are all physical as well, but we very rarely discuss or think or even talk about the energetics of just walking around in the world nonetheless, trying to connect with a partner. So this is very exciting. I'm delighted. So it's the, so that last one is called the initiation of the Dark Eros right?

[00:37:31] Lucia: The Dark Eros Initiation. Yes.

[00:37:34] Gwyn: Will there be like ritual aspects as well? Neat. Neat, neat. It's gonna be really fun. And, and this is all in July and tickets will be on Eventbrite. Fantastic.

[00:37:46] Lucia: I'm much excited about this and like, I love, I love, I love creating these spaces for people to really connect with themselves and the erotic expression, because I feel that our soul you know, we are a manifestation and a image of God Source Creator And just by reading those sentences from the scriptures to anyone who is religious, it just brings you this lightness and these liberation to be like, you know what? There is erotism in this universe. The universe is a pumping erotic source. Nothing exist in this world if it doesn't exist in a whole, right? Whatever we experienced in is what is being experienced across the universe, across the source. It whatever we, we feel the expressions that we have and we, manifest through us is how source manifests itself and experience. And so if we feel erotic, it's just so delightful to even feel and think that, Source God Creator Goddess are erotic as well. Because man, nothing will exist without existing in a whole. And that it what it makes me so excited about sharing with everyone the permission of that this, you know, that we have in those sentences of the scripture and Genesis, right? Like, what is the permission, right? That what's the above it below was inside and outside. You know, we are in the image of Source God Creators, and If I'm the image, it's like so much inspiration out of that. I don't know. I just love it.

[00:39:27] Gwyn: Well, you literally just answered my last question, but I'm gonna ask it anyway and see if something else comes out, which is, because the podcast is called What Excites Us. I always end by asking what excites you?

[00:39:44] Lucia: What excites me is all that.

[00:39:45] Gwyn: Yeah. I mean, you, you, I'm like, wait, no, I am. I'm supposed to ask it first. [00:39:54] Lucia: I'm a mind reader, energy reader. Don't tell that to my people.

[00:39:57] Gwyn: Yeah. Right. Yeah. That's dangerous. You don't wanna do that, then

[00:40:02] Lucia: Well, I tell everyone. I tell everyone we're not mind reader. We're not energy readers when, but when we tap into Source when we tap into the feel, we are not reading anything. We are feeling everything.

[00:40:14] Gwyn: yeah. And, and not being afraid to tap into that feeling, I think takes a lot of practice and is very valuable and I really appreciate it when I see it in others. So thank you for that. [00:40:29] Lucia: You are very welcome. Thank you for inviting me

[00:40:31] Gwyn: This has been great. This has been really, really great.

[00:40:34] Lucia: Oh my gosh. Thank you so much. I really appreciate you.

[00:40:37] Gwyn: You're welcome. I appreciate you as well.

So what do you think? Are you gonna go to these workshops or maybe even explore feeling into the light and dark eros in your play? I would truly love to hear your thoughts and you can indeed talk to me at whatexcitesus.com. I do have a favor to ask however. Please be sure that you are subscribed and more than that, if you could rate and review this podcast, it would be extremely appreciated. You can find ways to do that at the website too, or in the app that you are listening to us right now. I would love the opportunity to read your review to share with other folks like this one from Angie Griffiths who wrote, what a hot topic It is so awesome to have safe space to talk about stuff like this. Thanks for sharing your gift with the world. Thank you, Angie. Thank you, Angie. Leaving a rating is the best, easiest, and cheapest way to help this show since it's free and you don't have to do anything, but just take a couple minutes outta your time and hit a button. And we're hitting buttons all day long anyway. Right, right.

Okay. So what excites us? Oh, thank you, by the way. Thank you so much. What Excites Us is produced, edited, and hosted by me, Gwyn Isaacs, our podcast host is Tickle.Life. The music I use is under the Creative Commons attribution license, and the opening song is called Vendetta by Stephen Kartenberg and this is Quando by Julius H. Thanks for listening. You're awesome. Truly awesome.